Monday, February 02, 2015

Trusting God

These past few months have been a journey in learning to trust God and believe that He is enough regardless of what my future looks like.

After the miscarriage our desire to grow our family seemed even stronger. We talked to doctors and they gave us a renewed sense of hope.

In January, I stated Progesterone in hopes of helping us maintain a pregnancy. And that month we again saw the words we had been praying for.  This time the excitement was jaded by the feelings of fear, anxiety, what-if. We decided to keep it secret, to wait until our first appointment and pray that God would provide.

The day after we found out Roman came in the door and saw me and said "Whoa, mama, your belly is BIG, there is a baby in there". We laughed it off, but he has been adamant for the past 3 weeks that there is a baby in my belly. To be honest, I sometimes felt he was God's voice of reassurance in my life.

Today at 7 weeks, 1 day, Josh and I ventured to the doctor.  My anxiety on high, praying over and over that we would see a baby.  As I sat on the table, in the same room I sat 4 short months ago, I held my breath for a moment.

"There is your baby and there is the heartbeat".

What glorious words!!! Praise Jesus!!

So today we choose to celebrate, we choose to enjoy the days we have with this baby and pray God will allow us to hold this baby here on earth as well.

We shared the news with the kids today and they are so excited! I can't wait to see them respond to this baby they already love so much!!

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